A Major Problem

Posted by jon on January 29, 2011 in not so deep thoughts |

As a disclaimer, you will find no spiritual insight or really any redeeming qualities in the following ramblings, but I felt it was extremely important for me to address a growing problem in our super markets. That’s right, things have gotten out of control at our once peaceful grocery store…or as I like to call it the food distribution experience…and I’m not even talking about the misuse of the self checkout (I would talk about the self checkout but blood pressure has been a little high lately and I think that discussion might just finish me off).

Anyway, in the beginning there was the shopping basket. This was a revolutionary step forward in shopping. Finally we were free of the burden of carrying each and every item we longed to purchase. With the advent of the basket we could easily carry 5-8 items and all was well. But if the basket was a step forward, then the shopping cart was our onramp to the shopping super highway. With the shopping cart it was possible to collect a week’s, nay a month’s worth groceries or at least a couple of heavy things when you’re parked far away and you know what a pain it is to try and get those out to the car, anyway.

The shopping cart made the grocery store not a regular stop but an event, or at least a way to spend the better part of a Saturday. Shopping was now something to be planned. Coupons had to be cut, lists had to be made, and cart placement for each item became essential (cold stuff together, bread and eggs in the top section, etc).

And all was well. The basket/cart system served us for over two decades. Then it all went sideways. It started innocently enough (these things always do). We were introduced to those kid friendly monstrosities, the cart/car combo. These 6 wheel-behemoths have the ability to block an entire aisle and take roughly 30 feet of clearance to safely turn in the store. And somehow they seem to always be driven by 90lbs moms with multiple kids and enough food to scale Mount Everest. Unless these women are secretly training for the strongman competition the weight of these cart/cars is obscene.

What happened to the idea of kid sit in the cart and if you are good you might get something at the cash register. Which that never worked either cause the kid always wanted two things and then they throw a temper tantrum and things get messy. Basically there’s no good way to take kids to the store and these monster carts are doing nothing but proving that point.

And now there is what I like to call the bascart. This strange contraption is a mini cart. For when you don’t need a full size cart but you’re still too lazy to carry a basket. I will admit that at least the bascart is an improvement on the short lived basket stroller, but that’s about the best I can say of it. This ill-conceived shopping accessory was made of a small cart frame and you set your basket on it. Basically it was the equivalent of taking a radio flyer to the super market except you would have looked much less dorky with a radio flyer. Alas, goodbye basket stroller, we hardly knew ye.

And with the introduction of the bascart on the small end came the oversized cart for when you just need more stuff. It has room for two kinds in the top and while it is not as clumsy as its car-welding cousin its bulky design makes it useful only if your attempting to burn some of the empty calories from your last trip to the store.

With so many grocery carrying options presented it is easy for a shopper to feel overwhelmed. I mean we are being asked to make major decisions about our shopping trip before we even enter the store. The pressure mounts as no one wants to face the embarrassment of selecting the wrong cart size. Then you face the walk of shame to get a different size or you try and make what you have work and hope no one notices…but let me let you know…they notice, they always notice…and they mock you. It’s too much to expect of an already over taxed population and I for one am here to say nay nay!!! Just say no to over-carting. If it doesn’t fit in a basket get a cart. If it doesn’t fit in a cart you don’t need it. And if you’re thinking of using a bascart…why!?!

God is Everywhere. (I’m not sure where in here, but I just take my word for it)

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